In the last 3 years there was hardly any communication with him. He was seriously involved with this girl and they kept breaking up and making up. And the girl got pregnant. The one time he called was to announce this. But the relationship has become really bad and physical. They had a baby girl born November. It is sad to say that I have not seen the baby except one picture on my younger son's phone. I had sent them 2 big bags of present and a crocheted blanket and even my sister made a nice baby blanket. But there was never a thank you.
About a year after the birth of the baby, there was a serious fight and the police was involved and he was given restraining order. But after sometime both of them ignored the order and lived together until another serious altercation and he was charged. Now he is facing serious charges. He does not see the baby anymore according to his father. The baby is now 2 years old.
About the same time, the orphanage from where we adopted him got in touch with him saying his birth mother is requesting to communicate with him. At first he did not know what to do and did not reply but later, he communicated with him. The birth mother communicated with his father to ask what was his childhood like. Then she requested to connect with my younger son although there was never any communication with him. I do not know who else she was communicating but there was never a request to communicate with me. I knew that it would not happen and never expected it.
A few days ago, my former husband told me that he lives very close to where I live. I have managed not to let him know where I had been living. He has a new girl friend. I do not know if there is still communication with his birth mother. I was told she wanted him to fly to the Philippines but at this time it is not possible for him to do that. The birth mother mentioned to my ex husband that she may travel to the Philippines. I also found out that he has also communicated with his birth father who works in UAE.
When we adopted my only hope was that it would turn out ok. But I was also realistic that there have been a lot of cases where it has not turned out well. I have no regrets and deep within me, I believe that I have done my best and that is all I can do. He is an adult now and whatever or whoever he turned out to be was mostly his decision. And we are all responsible for any action we have taken.
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