Wonderful memories....

Today, he would have been 32 years old. I wonder if he would have been married, with children. Perhaps not. Would he have been successful with the business he started, probably. What kind of car would he be driving? What electronic toys would he own? What kind of music would he be listening to?What kind of food would he prefer to eat? What places would he have visited? A lot of questions and really no answers.

For the last five years, that is what I struggled with. Questions and no answers. But with time, I have learned to have questions and I am beginning to learn that I will get no answers and now it is fine with me. I have accepted the fact that, this is how it will be.

I lived with the pain and now it is not as hard as before. Maybe the cliche time heals everything is true. I do not know about closure. Sometimes I think closure is forgetting and I do not want that.

Memories, that is what I have left and it is a good feeling to have. I remember a lot of them when he was younger and there are times when I can smile about them. There are memories when he was an adult and those I really treasure. I am thankful that there was this time in my life that I was trying to find out what to do and I spent a few months with him and my sister and we got some kind of bonding. And not knowing that would be the last I would spend time with him.

Now I can say I am at peace with what happened, though there are times I still do not understand why.But I am fine with it.

So Gino, Happy Birthday and I believe where ever you are, you are also at peace. You will always be in our hearts.